Leave and Cleave, Part 1

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Genesis 2:24 (NLT)
This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.

So you finally met your soulmate. The moment he or she walked into your personal space, you knew something was different about this person; you had so many things in common: your worldview, your taste in certain food, clothing, music, hobbies, friends … everything about your soulmate felt familiar, like you had known each other before. As a matter of fact, according to the dictionary a soulmate is someone with whom you share a deep and natural affinity, as if fate or destiny has brought the two of you together.

At least, that’s how it feels until a little past your wedding day. This is where those of us who have been married for some time tend to break into uncontrollable laughter. You thought the wedding and finding a good caterer or florist was hard? Well, just wait. Now the wedding is over and the marriage has begun.

As humans, we are creatures of habit. We love being comfortable; we enjoy surroundings that are familiar; therefore, we work hard to recreate some of these things. If there is something oddly familiar about your “soulmate,” that’s because the two of you are about to recreate the past that shaped you—the good and the bad. When you stood in front of your family and friends, you vowed to stay for better or worse, in sickness and in health, and you felt ready to take on the world because you had found a trusted ally.

But now the wars you fight are not with the enemy; they are often with each other. If now it is your marriage that makes you sick, and not an actual illness, then before you choose divorce as your remedy, please try to fully understand the disease that has infected your marriage.