Letting Go

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Isaiah 43:19

“Behold, I will do a new thing, now it shall spring forth; Shall you not know it? I will even make a road in the wilderness and rivers in the desert.”

One of the hardest things I experienced after being diagnosed with myositis and interstitial lung disease was the change I had to make in my lifestyle. Having worked in and for the military, I was constantly on the go, and I was comfortable with what I believed was my purpose. I had a rewarding job and thoughtful, kind friends. I remember the day my doctor told me that if I wanted any chance for a stable life with this disease, I should consider relocating to a warmer climate.

Trying to find my way in a new place, 3,000 miles away from everything I knew and loved, was difficult. I had to adjust to a new time zone, new people, new doctors, and new friends. It was hard to enjoy the new things I was experiencing because I wanted the familiar things from my past. At one point, I almost went back; I had to remind myself of what was waiting for me back there — namely, more relapses, more sick days away from work, and increased hospitalizations. You see, I was almost willing to go back to a place that kept me sick because I was too afraid to embrace the new and the unknown.

It took some time to find my way in the great state of California, but here, my disease has remained in remission, which has allowed me to do things I could never have done in my previous home. As a result, I have found a new purpose and a new hope in my future. If I had clung to the past and what was, I would have never enjoyed the moments of what is.

May you have the courage to leave the past where it is and move toward the good things that are waiting for you in the future.